Reflections on Foster Care, Summer Camp, and Loving in the Midst of Uncertainty.

This summer's theme at camp was "Upside Down."  Being a follower of Jesus means being willing to have your life turned completely upside down, remembering all the while that the end result is living forever with Him. The Bible is clear in showing and telling us some ways that this should affect our lives.

To be first we must be last.
To get we must give.
To be wise, we must become fools.
To save our life, we must lose it.
To reign, we must serve.
To be exalted, we must become humble.
To really live we must die.
To be strong we must be weak.

Each year since we have been at The Oaks, the summer theme seems to come alive in our personal lives and strike a chord in our hearts in some way. This year it happened again...


We were placed with a six-week-old foster baby girl on July 12. She was absolutely precious. Beautiful. Healthy. A perfect fit for our family. Three weeks later she was placed with a birth parent.  The case was a roller coaster ride from day one.  Of course, we had been hoping the case would move toward adoption (since this is our intention in fostering), and it was heartbreaking in so many ways to see her go. But God is teaching us to trust Him in deeper ways than we could ever have imagined.  We are so thankful for the time we had with her, and we have continued to keep in touch with some of her birth family. We don't know why God chose us to be involved in her life for this brief period of time, and we may never know, but we do know that she will remain in our hearts and prayers forever.

Foster care is definitely one of the hardest things we have ever undertaken; it requires agape love in the most raw sense of the word.  Although we are newbies in the foster care world, we often have people tell us,

"I could never do that...it would just be too hard to love a child so much and then have to let go."  

Well...we can't do it either.

Not on our own. Not without Jesus. Yes, it is risky, scary, and overwhelming. But isn't love always risky? We are never guaranteed our biological children will be with us forever, but do we love them less because we are afraid of someday letting go?  That would be absurd.  We can never let fear keep us from loving wholeheartedly and without reserve. Only because of God's grace can we love fully when all of our futures on this earth are uncertain and foggy.

As I've been thinking about foster care, love, and loss, it became clear that summer camp at The Oaks and foster care have some commonalities.  These precious kids come to camp, many from unthinkable home situations.  Our counselors become their parents for the week, loving without reserve and without fear of having to let them go at the end of the week. And the result is that many of them leave knowing Jesus and are able to be absolutely sure of their future after this life.

Knowing these kids are going back to compromising environments here on this earth is painful and hard to understand, but causes our staff to trust in a God whose ways are always higher than ours. They will never regret loving these kids, as painful as it is when they go. If their counselors don't love them honestly and wholeheartedly, the kids may never understand what unconditional, sacrificial love is and how it mirrors God's love for them.

As human beings, we try and try to control our lives, to always know what is happening, why it is happening and how we can change the bad into good. Even in full-time ministry it is so easy to think we are the ones causing the change and doing the work.  But the reality is that we are not in control--we never have been and never will be (thankfully!). When we finally own up to this truth and allow the One in charge to turn our lives upside-down and out-of-control, only then we can have true peace and joy.

God's love never disappoints. Even when we can't see the good in what He is doing, not doing, or where He is placing people on this earth, we can always trust that He is working things out for good. He has it all in his hands. So, as we wrap up another summer of loving on some of His precious kids, we can look at their faces and rejoice in knowing that they are His and that we could not have loved them more while they were in our care.

*We are currently open for another foster-adopt placement, and, because of the huge need for families, it is likely that we will be placed with another baby over the next month.  We would appreciate your prayers for the next situation and everyone involved: the baby, the judge, social workers, and the birth family.